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Wednesday, 19 January 2011

Zombie Wombles and the Keywords of Destiny

Just to COMPLETELY change the subject: Do you ever look up in Blogger stats or Statcounter to see what search keywords brought visitors to your blog?

Zombie Womble. That's what brought someone to mine*.

Now I've posted about Wombles and I've posted about Zombies, but not in the same breath... until today.

Over at Cultural Snow, the erudite Tim Footman was saying just the other day (in this post: Jammy Helen Mirren) how many people stumble across his blog when searching for semi-clad ladies, just because he may have mentioned them in passing. Similarly, Army of Dave is struggling to cope with being associated with a contemptible racist politician following the runaway success of his Nick Griffin Question Time Drinking Game.

It's a sobering lesson in being careful what you post about - these things can come back and bite you... A bit like Tobermory here.

... but on the other hand (and I wonder what Tobe did with the other hand?) it could point the way to a GAP in the market. Maybe, I thought, there ought to be somewhere people can go for a zombie womble if they want one?

By the way - what do you think at my first attempts at image manipulation? It was done with a free programme GIMP 2.6 which I am told has much of the functionality of Photoshop without the price tag.

So, who would like a poem then?..

Zombie Womble

Underground, overground, back from their tomb
The Wombles are Zombies and lurk in the gloom
Munching the brains of the people they find
Great Uncle Bulgaria’s eating mankind!

Underground, overground, up from their graves
Nothing is wasted, everything saved
Matted with black and malodorous mud
Lumbering Wombles are hungry for blood!

And in their foul burrow there’s always a store
Of bits of old bodies all covered in gore
Where Madame Cholet, her apron streaked red
Is cooking up something to feed the Undead

Bumbling, stumbling, Wombling free
They want to recycle the best bits of ME!
Oh no! Orinico is coming to get me!
The Wombles of Wimbledon Common all ATE ME!!



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13 comments:

  1. Dave19 January 2011 at 08:20

    The funniest thing I've read today.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ellie Garratt19 January 2011 at 08:22

    Wombles and Zombies! You cheered up my morning. Who else could have thought of a such a great pairing? The image is great, as well.

    I've only looked at my stats a couple of times but I must do it more often. Thanks for reminding me!

    ReplyDelete
  3. broken biro19 January 2011 at 09:40

    Dave - The day ain't over yet! Come back later and say that...

    Ellie - Happy to cheer up your morning... you know what they say: 'Start the day with a subverted children's icon of the 80's' ... What? They don't say that?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Dave19 January 2011 at 10:29

    I must admit your blog was the first thing I'd read this morning. I hadn't planned to mention that.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Martin19 January 2011 at 13:51

    Of course, now that you've mentioned GIMP, all sorts of strange visitors will be paying you a call. You have seen 'Pulp Fiction' haven't you?

    Actually, GIMP is excellent, I have it on my FREE operating system, Ubuntu 10.10, which runs on my laptop. And, why fork out for Microsoft Office when you can download 'libreoffice' for nowt?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Karen19 January 2011 at 15:05

    As if Wombles aren't scary enough without being zombies. Terrifying stuff.

    The most popular keywords for mine are 'turkey cartoon' and 'Richard Armitage' have been for quite some time!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Rog19 January 2011 at 19:13

    This is like "Who's line is it Anyway" but without Dinsdale Landen.

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  8. Annie (Lady M) x19 January 2011 at 20:27

    oh my life... Did this post make me laugh or what? You have got issues gal... don't resolve them!

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  9. Susan Scheid (Raining Acorns)20 January 2011 at 03:30

    A favorite search that lands folks at RA is "Gina De Laurentiis cleavage, when, hey, the post is about cooking with Giada! Who knew?

    ReplyDelete
  10. TimT20 January 2011 at 07:49

    Zombles?

    ReplyDelete
  11. broken biro20 January 2011 at 08:47

    Martin - Yes, that did occur to me, but I think anyone looking for that kind of gimp on t'internet these days will be disappointed... I know I was! (Open Office also good)

    Karen - I just tried looking fro your turkey cartoons, and failed! Are you teasing?

    Rog - Huh? *looks confused*

    Annie - I don't plan to! 8-D

    Rainy - It's pictures people are looking for mainly, I suppose.

    Tim - Or Wombies - you choose!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Brigid O'Connor23 February 2012 at 11:36

    Loved that, definitely better than the original. Underwear certainly features a lot in search words, thanks for the laugh:)

    ReplyDelete
  13. broken biro23 February 2012 at 16:23

    Ditto! And thanks for stopping by

    ReplyDelete