Thursday 25 October 2012

Trick or Treat?

Woooo...ooooh! *creepy music* - one of my spooky stories is now available on the Ether Books app, and it's FREE to download.

'Trick or Treat?' is a flesh-crawling tale of a young girl with a big secret. Here's an excerpt:

The bathroom radiator clanged cheerfully, but her skin had tightened with gooseflesh. She climbed into the shower and stood under the gushing head of it without moving, mesmerized by the scarlet spinning down the plughole. She closed her eyes.

‘I’m not a witch.’ She whispered. ‘I’m not witch.’

The man had said she must be – she was dressed like one. His voice was soft, but his eyes bored into her like the priest on Good Friday when he talked about redemption, damnation - words she did not fully understand.  Continue reading on the Ether Books app

Ether Books is a fab short-fiction app for iPhone, iPod and iPad. Simply download the app and search for my name: Clare Kirwan (it's a different - picture of me than usual - see top left).

Tuesday 23 October 2012

Bossiepoo and Schnoodle

Dalmapoo and Rough poo ('artist's' impression... ahem)
We had a border collie when I was growing up. Her name was Scooby - we'd been told she was a 'he' at the puppy shop. The Dooby Doo was optional (the Dooby Doo is always optional.)

I'd like a dog but I'm put off by the moulting. In the exhibition currently on at the library there's a nice oil landscape that's only just visible through a thin veneer of pet hairs.  That's the reason for the current trend in crossing other dogs with poodles, which apparently don't shed hairs.

You have probably heard of the labradoodle and possibly the cockerpoo, but there are some you may not have come across:
  • Bossie-Poo (Boston terrier / poodle)
  • Giant Schnoodle (Giant Schnauzer / Standard Poodle)
  • Pekingese / Poodle mix.. wait for it.... Pekepoo!
  • Saint Berpoodle
  • Welsh Terrier / Poodle mix - Woodle
  • and possible the cutest ... the Westiepoo

I'm not making these up - you can see the full, extraordinary list on Dog Breed Info / Poodlemix

Where will it all end?  How to choose between Boxenese and Aire-enese? The small but vicious Yorkieweile, the lascivious Cocker-Pinscher or the alarmist Skye-Pointer? What about a nice King Charles Shit?

Things we have learned from this post? 
  1. Never let a child name a dog. You can call a rabbit Neil (you know who you are), but there are some things you just don't want to shout across the park
  2. Don't try painting with oils in the same room as a pet