Tuesday, 20 July 2010

Pools, fools and broken rules

It's been a funny old day with one thing and another. 

I got a bit wet with all that rain - which was odd because I was inside the library. I'm reliably informed this happens all the time (although presumably only when it's raining) and we're waiting to see if we can have a new roof.

Then someone was passing round a list of real questions people have asked librarians:

'Do you have books here?'

'Do you have a list of all the books I've read'?

'Do you have any books with photographs of dinosaurs?'

'Can you tell me why so many famous battles were fought on National Park sites?'

'Where in the library can I find a power socket for my hair dryer?'

'Do you have that book... it's by a local author, I don't remember the name of the author or the title of the book, but it's a big one.'

There are more of them here.

Meanwhile, there have been missives from The Powers That Be regarding money-savings, which include a biscuit embargo and severe cutbacks on 'casual photocopying'. I'm not entirely sure what 'casual photocopying' is - maybe it's when you do it in your PJs. Someone suggested they mean 'frivolous or unnecessary copying' and in an attempt to clarify this I asked whether it was when you are photocopying your own arse?

Then I remembered - I had promised myself I wouldn't say 'arse' in the library again.

Then My Favourite Artist visited and made me say 'penis' again so my copybook is well and truly blotted now. Just a fortnight away from finishing my probationary period too.

But by far my favourite line of the day was from a little old lady this afternoon. I was having trouble making out what she was saying when she announced: 'Oh, I've just realised - I've come out without me teeth!"


  1. Whoever said libraries are boring? A favourite question from students was something like, "I was reading a red book last night, and this morning someone's moved it. Can you help me find it again?"

    A good trick if you can do it, with more than 1.5 million titles to plough through - some red, some un-red.

  2. I just wish I lived closer and could spend some time hiding out in the stacks of your library.
    People are silly, really. When I worked for an airline reservations service, I got a woman who booked a flight then wanted to select her seat. "Not a window seat. I'm going to a funeral and I'll have just had my hair done."

    You are the funniest librarian I have ever met, BB.

  3. Martin & Deb - both great examples!

    The one I get the most is 'Have you got a book...?' I pretend not to hear the '...' and immediately answer: 'Yes, lots and lots.'

    I think my new colleagues will tire of me quickly.

  4. Actually, a list of all the books I've read WOULD be quite helpful.

  5. Dream on, Elly!

    Oh, and here's another to add to the canon:
    'I'm looking for a book my a local author. I don't remember the title, or the author but it was very BIG.'